So much thoughts running in my mind now, I don't know where to start .

Having this massive headache now but still decided to pen all this thoughts down , at least I'm gonna feel better. Just lost my pendant at the gym earlier on, seriously what a way to start off my September. I was hoping that it would be better , at least better than August as it's the worst month so far. Couldn't explain the feeling of losing something with sentimental value. It may not be something expensive but well it's something that I kept so closely with me for the past 2 year. Damn ,all I can do now is pray hard that they found the pendant and call me back.

Breaking down and letting you see that vulnerable side of me wasn't my intention , I swear it was so embarrassing, I've been thinking, thinking of all the things you said. I don't know but probably you just make it sounds like it's my fault that things didn't work out.I guess communication is the key to everything. Ever thought when was the last time you actually showed you cared? We just come to a point of taking things for granted. You know I would always be there, don't you?  If you ever realized, it was me all along holding onto this whole damn relationship. I'm not saying that you didn't put in effort I know you did but it just wasn't enough. Wasn't enough to show that actually I did matters or probably I just don't. I expected so much more from you but each time it just leads to more disappointments that it came to point that I stopped. 10 months isn't short , you gave me so much to remember. The good and bad times. Think , have I ever even asked anything from you. All I wanted was your assurance, your attention and I don't think that's a lot to ask for. It's not like I need you to be 24/7 there for me. Well , just gonna admit that maybe I just wasn't worth it , wasn't worth more of your time and effort. Can't deny that I still miss you but I guess a part of me wish that you didn't exists in my life. I'm trying to be optimistic about things , I know time will heal and someday somehow I would feel nothing for you. Meanwhile, I'm just gonna keep myself so busy everyday.By the time I reached home I would be too exhausted to even think of you.

A part of me still believes we can find a way to work it out. But I know we have tried everything we could try.

I wish nothing but the best for you ,h.